Heart Shaped Box

Beck smiled a bit. "Take a nap. It'll be okay," he compelled Alex, his voice enough for his power to work on the man. He would only sleep for a few hours, but he would wake up feeling good.

Alex's eyes fell closed and he laid on the couch, instantly falling into a peaceful sleep. His muscles were intense and relaxed, which was a first for the blond man.

Beck smiled and kissed his cheek. "I'll be right back," he whispered though he knew that the man couldn't hear him. He left the hotel, going to the forest and scoping out someone to feed on.

An hour or so later, he was back in the penthouse next to Alex, feeling better than he had a few hours ago.

Alex awoke when Beck arrived. He smiled slightly at him, the expression almost invisible. "Hey, where'd you go?" He asked, sitting and stretching, yawning as his hair fell in his face.

"Just had a few things to do. How'd you sleep?" Beck asked, sitting back down on the couch next to him.

Alex shrugged. "I slept, woke up, wrote a song before going back to sleep again." He said, chuckling a little.

Beck chuckled. "Of course you did," he said and relaxed against the couch, feeling slightly high from his meal.

Alex nodded, lazily sinking into the couch. "It's about you..." He murmured almost incoherently.

Beck smiled. "Really? Is it? Can I see it?" he asked. "Or, well hear it?"

"I-If you want.... I can't guarantee you'll like it." Alex murmured softly and grabbed the guitar, tuning it before he began to play the first verse and chorus.

"I will never bother you
I will never promise too
I will never follow you
I will never bother you

Never say a word again
I will crawl away for good

I will move away from here
You won't be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew it would come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail
Paaain...
Paaain...
Paaain...

Beck listened, unsure of how to react to the lyrics. "Wow," he said once Alex had finished.

Alex chuckled a little. "It's not finished yet..." He said and continued to the next verse, the 2nd one being more understandable.

"You know you're right
You know you're right
You know you're right...

I'm so warm and calm inside
I no longer have to hide
Lets talk about someone else
Steaming soup against his mouth
Nothing really bothers him
He just wants to love himself

I will move away from here
You won't be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew it'd come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail

Paaain..."

Beck blinked. He still had no idea how to take it. He was never one keen on knowing the meaning behind words and phrases and... things.

Alex chuckled nervously. "It's okay if you don't like it. I know you probably don't get it..." He said, looking down at the guitar, causing his naturally bright blond hair to fall in his face.

"It's not that. I just... I'm not entirely sure how to take it. I'm not good with symbolism ans meaning," Beck said, smiling slightly.

Alex smiles softly. "Its... Wellt eh first part is kind of... me promising you that.. I won't do what I've done. Drugs and all that... A-And then it kinda gets darker. 'Things have never been so swell' was sarcasm, as in... it hurts. I hurt."

He sighed as he tried to explain it. "When I say 'You know your right', it means that... you know you were right, about me trying to get better, if you understand. And then the verse where it says 'Nothing really bothers him..' etc, its talking about you. How you make me feel I guess... How happy you seem." He said and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry, I'm bad at explaining my own songs."

Beck chuckled and kissed him. "I don't care what it means. You make me happy. That is what I care about," Beck said, stroking his face gently with a soft smile.

Alex smiled a little and slowly wrapped an arm around Beck's waist, leaning into him. "I like you." He whispered, closing his eyes.

Beck chuckled softly. "That's good, because I like you, too. Like, a lot," he said and kissed the top of Alex's head, holding him close.

Alex smiled a real smile, the first in years. "Thanks..." Alex whispered, opening his eyes and looking down at his lap.

"We're gonna get you better, Alex. I promise. Okay?" he asked, rubbing his back. He was going to make sure of it, because he did like Alex a lot. More than he had liked anyone in all of his years of living. "I'm always here for you. Even when you try to push me away," he added.

Alex nodded shakily, biting his nails and bouncing his leg up and down. Withdrawal started to sink into his system. He tried to hide his cold sweats, but the signs of the pain weren't really that scarce. He looked at Beck. "O-Okay but... I just... haven't been off it since I was a teen and..." He shifted in his seat, putting his head in his hands.

Beck rubbed his back. "Babe, I know it's hard. But we can get through it together. And I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to be here until you grow old and die. Because I love you that much. I love you so much, it's hard to believe I can feel this way. You complete me, and I'll do anything to make sure that you're okay. I'll do anything you want me to," he said and kissed the top of his head.

Alex wiped away a few tears, Beck's words touching his abused heart. He never had anyone take care of him the way Beck has. He never felt this loved, and never loved someone like this. "T..Thank you." He whispered, pulling his knees tight to his chest.

"You don't need to thank me, Alex. I love you, and you love me. That's thanks enough," Beck said and kisses him gently, his heart fluttering in his chest at the love he felt for the other man.